Just a couple days ago
Feeling numb Lost Empty Aimless Apathetic Not sure Which way to go Sitting On the road In the rain What’s the focus? My mom? The children? Work? Dinner? My own peace of mind? All need attention None are getting exactly What they need My highest place Connected before But now Where did it go? Lost in the swamp Now I almost miss Feeling numb Wishing pain Wasn’t so painful Hurts so bad Tonight I laid Next to my mom With her hand On my head I cried And cried Like a little girl With a broken heart I could’ve stayed Like that All night Crying Next to my mama I see where this is going My mother’s time My sister And her children Leaving Going home Somehow I thought We would stay All together Again Til the end I need them My siblings Together Strong Taking turns Being weak We had those times Not long enough All together Me My sis Four kids In one little room Snug & Sweet Cozy As could be Comfort In the closeness Of us Wishing Time Could last forever Stand still Under one roof In our mother’s house Now It’s no longer Time is done They are back Portland Home My mom Here But they’re gone Piece of me Gone forever It’s done Can’t turn back Time Heart broken Longing for more Of the one thing We don’t have Time Together Been away A long time Living life Not here But there I know It had to be It was good But now What if’s Of the life I didn’t lead Here Those pieces Of me I would’ve known Maybe Maybe not Or maybe Now’s the time To get them back One week ago I drove Home To my mom’s house Left turn To her house I turn right To my old homes Apartments that grew me I went to say hello To get back Those pieces of me I left there Ages 5 to 13 I pull up In front Of that house Turn off the car I listen To the house It tells me You’re done With the pain These walls Held You know that well Now take the rest Pieces of you You left here Your gifts Poetry Dancing Theater Take those pieces of you And the joy Goodness of life Go They are with you Now And I go I take them back Pieces of me Always been there Buried Now Just remembering To use them Enjoy them Practicing Living my dreams Letting go of the rest And I drive To the next house On the street Full of children Where my best friend & I met When we were three I went first Past her old house Send some pieces of her Back Home to her Then I pull up Park in front That house 3 to 5 years Wait For the pieces Of me To return Feeling confused Because This house Is empty Then I remember Last September In NY I got her back That girl With the long hair Who loved purple That girl Who became a grown-up In that house Little old lady girl Heart of human existence She felt at home there Got her strength She knew people’s pain Universal Humanity’s common bond I got her back Last September Her sparkle too I set her free To come back to me Sometimes She says She doesn’t know how to fly Maybe that’s true Maybe that’s not her thing Pain isn’t light like feathers And she is of a different place Learning how to be with her She is teaching me of her ways That go deep Roots of ancient trees Where darkness dwells Where life springs forth That little girl How I am to be her As a grown woman Not quite sure Yet Takes time Learning Bringing Old pieces Of me Back Where they belong I wobble Like a baby Learning How to walk I write I dance Strong & true What else can I do? Welcome them back Bitter Sweet My mom’s gift And her legacy too
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Mama Megan
Hi friends, I write from the heart to tell my life story, and the story of those in my neighborhood called life. Research shows that our children's emotional & mental health is contingent upon us parents being able to tell our life story, or "coherent narrative." This is my coherent narrative, my life story in the making, with some of what I love in life too. My goal is to share my life in a way that is real, uplifting & positive- sometimes serious, sometimes fun. In my practice, I inspire parents to empowerment through reclaiming our life stories and learning respectful discipline. My work is my offering to our children- our future. Wishing you all a happy family! Archives
May 2021
|